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Faced with the unutterable, words still disintigrate...
And ever new, out of the most quivering stones, music builds her divine house in useless space.
-Rilke
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I am moody.
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[I am not very good at html]
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sometimes i wish... [a blog]
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Sunday, February 17, 2002
i am extremely short-sighted
sometimes i really want to scream and kick, but other times, when i don't, i look at the people who do and i think, "my, i hope i don't look like that." and then i think, "it would suck to be a hypocrite." and then i think, "i guess it sucks to be anyone." and then i think, "i am very unappreciative."
as if i deserve to walk.
as if i deserve to breathe.
as if i deserve to have a stomach.
as if i deserve to have a loving family.
as if i deserve to have friends.
as if i deserve to sleep in.
as if i deserve to love.
i am so completely ignorant. and i get off thinking i know something, or thinking i'm humble, or thinking in any way i'm better than anyone else. nobody really sees what they have. neither do i. that's life. undeserved. like Love. completely, totally undeserved.
maybe that's why it's so beautiful.
11:32 PM
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