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Faced with the unutterable, words still disintigrate...
And ever new, out of the most quivering stones, music builds her divine house in useless space.
-Rilke
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I am moody.
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[I am not very good at html]
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sometimes i wish... [a blog]
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Monday, January 06, 2003
ok, sorry for the break my unfaithful readers.
i went to the dominican republic for a week on a mission trip.
summary: God is good.
did some door-to-door stuf for the first time. amazing. purely amazing. people would welcome you in and talk and be really honest with you. wow. not the usa at all. and then i got to pray for people, like, right there with them. it was awesome. God is awesome.
i love my friends. i gave them real presents i think. and that is good. real, heartfelt ones. they deserve them. i want to give real presents to people always. i made my own christmas cards this year. i'm glad i did. i wish people knew how passionately i loved them. i mean that in a general and specific way. i don't care for much other than people and God. well, and art [that being inclusive of music/film, obviously]. but art is only people expressed. hearts and ideas and passions put into words, pictures, and sounds. which is why i hate products. they aren't people. they aren't real. they are self-indulgent, thoughtless, and made-for-profit. but, even there i can see people. so i can only hate products so much. and people are creations, the art, of God. so, the same way i love music because of people, i love people because they are God expressed--or at least, the need of God expressed. both really. the beautiful and the wretched in one body. always needy, always a shining soul. something marvelously inexplicable about it. the duality of man. the duality of life. the duality of good and evil. the principle of opposites. thus the domain name of this blog. it's bigger than me to remind me that i am small. a god thing to be reminded of when i think i am so big that i have right to complain. which i do often.
Thank you Jesus for being Jesus.
Thank you God for being God.
Thank you.
i am so incapable and so loved.
goodnight.
12:56 AM
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